Getting
Unstuck

Growing up, I had an irrational fear of quicksand. Maybe it was the cartoons and shows I watched as a kid, but I was convinced it was a genuine threat I needed to stay ready for. I am now 32 years old and have never encountered quicksand in my life. Thank God for that.

Here's what I have come to understand. The threats we see dramatized on TV are rarely just about the literal thing. They almost always represent something deeper. Quicksand, for me, became a picture of something far more real than anything I could step into in the woods.

Quicksand represents feeling stuck.

That is opposite to how we are wired as athletes. We were built for brute force. We willed our way through every obstacle on the field. So when life presents something that does not respond to effort alone, it throws us off. It feels wrong to slow down. It feels like weakness to ask for help. But that instinct, the one that says push harder and figure it out alone, is the very thing that will take you under.

Think back to those scenes. The main character is sinking fast. They are thrashing and fighting and going nowhere. Then comes the moment where they stop. They breathe. They move slowly, intentionally, one step at a time. That is what finally gets them out. Other times, they exhaust every option on their own and find themselves neck-deep, reluctantly waiting for someone to throw them a lifeline. A hand. A stick. A friend who showed up.

I have never been in actual quicksand, but I have absolutely found myself sinking under the pressures of relationships, finances, and the weight of expectations. My nature is to will my way through, grind until the end, arrive bloody and battered but still standing. At least that is how I picture it in my head.

Life is a team sport. Football taught us that, and just like on the field, the question is not how can I do this myself. The question is, who is on my team? When I am lost, who can help guide me? When I am sinking, who will offer a lifeline? When I feel off course, who will help me get realigned?

As we move into Men's Health Month and the halfway point of the year, I want to encourage every brother reading this to take a real moment and check in with yourself. Not a surface-level check-in. A real one. How are you actually doing? How is your team looking?

Maybe it is time to tap into therapy. Talking to someone who can offer an unbiased, nonjudgmental perspective while giving you the tools to climb out of your rut. Maybe it is reaching out to an old friend you have not spoken to in a while. Maybe it is scheduling that doctor's visit you have been putting off. Getting back in tune with your fitness. Having the conversation you have been avoiding. Extending forgiveness you have been holding back, for someone else or for yourself.

I say all of this to bring light to one truth I believe with everything in me.

Do not lose hope in the middle. Keep going and do not be afraid to reach out a hand or grab the one being extended to you.

That is what brotherhood is for.